I'm a dork!

I am sitting here unable to sleep as usual. Just got back from Dil's surprise 70's skating party and I am sitting here with my knee propped up after a spill with my derby wife Blonde Ice. I find the irony of being a rollergirl sometimes sadistic in the fact that I can never skate in a normal atmosphere without getting hurt. Why? Because I am so used to pads and when I fall my memory automatically goes to fall on my knees. Both got hurt, but my left took the brunt. The pain shot up like a torpedo to my brain and there for a few minutes I just rolled around on the floor doing breathing techniques. Why? Cause I have forgotten how to cry. Seriously. I have cried like maybe twice this year. I do believe it is a good coping mechanism, but for some odd reason mine has been shut off for awhile. Every now and then I might get a small choke on something on TV or on the news, but it ends as quickly as it started. And as far as getting hurt well, I notice my body instead just shoots pain everywhere to cope. I get a headache from hurting my knee. That sucks! Crying would be so much simpler. But alas I am broken.

On a better note, we got in from Oklahoma around 10ish tonight to find my Board approved letter stating I will get my license soon. Woo Hoo! Finally. I also got me a derby ball gown from my sister, which is better than anything else I have looked at thus far. Tomorrow... or I mean tonight is the NWARG potluck so today I will spend getting ready for that. Hopefully my knee cooperates. Will post the pics from the party soon. I have some really good ones I must say... just none of me and my fancy play skates with jump bar. Shame on me. Although, those things are cursed now and I am afraid to ever wear them again. Anyone wear a size 5?